Tomorrow is coming

Today I leave you all with the peace of mind.
Tomorrow is coming,
So today shouldn't have to go less than fine.
Should it go this way,
Tomorrow is coming.
A new day to start,
A new chance to break apart
From the negativity people leave on your shoulders,
The talk behind your only back,
The crud they left under your shoes,
When you stepped out to take your drag.
Tomorrow is coming.
Any issues unresolved will be solved on their own.
Leave the garbage thrown at your face on the floor,
I don't want to keep hearing the blame.
I'm a bad friend,
A bad voice,
A bad try.
I know not what I do,
I thought I was doing by you right.
Those who have left me,
They left for the better.
Only to find out,
The better is what they left behind.
I'm not bigger,
I'm not smaller.
I'm just me.
If you can't handle this,
Or expected more than what you see,
I apologize in advance.
I'm done dealing with the insecurity.
This is me.
I can't wait for tomorrow.
Tomorrow is coming.

Useless?

Why am I unlucky?
Do my choices make me smaller?
I used to feel tall,
Now it's getting smaller and smaller.
I think of myself,
I think of my choices.
I hear those screams in my head,
They sound like me with voice on top of voices.
I can't sit still.
My mind is a wander.
I think I should leave this place,
Let my self get cleared while I ponder.
I don't have money.
I don't even have time.
I think this could be a mistake.
It's my mistake, however, all mine.
They said I was somebody.
That somebody was me.
I forgot what I used to do.
I forgot things that made me happy.
I want to let go.
I want my true being to show.
I don't think its there anymore.
I don't think anyone could care at all.
I care for those who are like me and not.
I feel bad for those driven by greed,
And those driven to stop.
I want to let go of my fears.
Let go of my insecurities.
I don't think its possible.
Maybe it is.
I should hurry.

Surpassing.

Last month.
Last year.
Yesterday.
All gone before my eyes.
I could never find satisfaction in the old.
Seeing new things, gave me joy.
Joy that could never last long enough.
This month.
This year.
Today.
Right here before my eyes.
I want to find and hold to satisfaction in the new.
Seeing old things, will cause me to remember good memories.
Memories that are no longer around, yet vivid in my mind.
Next month.
Next Year.
Tomorrow.
Not yet seen, but I await with these eyes.
If I have found satisfaction, I will be grateful.
Recollecting everything, even thoughts help the move.
Movement I can only endure as well as participate.
I am ready for everyday,
I just need my own heart to follow.

What If I...

What if I were somebody important,
Making big decisions onto big ideas.
What if I had the will to exceed in life,
Better than how I let myself be treated.
I could solve the world's problems.
I could save every dime.
I could save a race of humans,
Within one blink for each eye.
I could be a master of sciences.
I could be a general of militias.
I could be a saxophone player,
I could be head chef in a kitchen.
But I am none of those things,
I won't even try.
I'm just too picky,
And get bored very fast, every time.
I have no motivation,
I've lost the reason to groove.
Someone should push me,
But it's me who won't move.
I've let myself be satisfied with what I have.
The time I'll waste will be gone.
Tomorrow is a new day,
I can't stop singing yesterday's song.
I'm compelled to speak my mind,
Yet I have shut my mouth.
The last time was an outrage they said.
I didn't want to punish the crowd.
I don't know where to move from this feeling.
I'm sure one day I'll find
The reason to be again.
This I know is truth.
Just when will the time, be time.

The Eagle Eye

They seek me from a distance.
So far, yet so close I could almost listen.
Reading mouths,
They talked about so-called funny things.
How some were not privileged,
And suffering was a game,
The taste of acid wouldn't even sting.
Diamond rings, rings of fire.
They want all that a sultan asks for,
In his slumbers and in his desires.
His empire,
So cautious.
To overthrow a tyrant meant risking it all
The thought made them nauseous.
We want our freedom,
We seek the enemy.
They paced by close.
I could spot them,
There's less than 33.
They want my knowledge,
The power I hold they seek.
My power is not what they think it is,
They have over-exaggerated my peak.
I leaked,
Every possible clue to make them think I went left.
I had to stay right.
My mind was in turmoil,
Running was no option,
Fleeing would only cause me to foil.
Every plan I have,
Every blueprint they need,
I have tattooed into my mind,
I've sown my mouth shut,
What can they possibly get out of me?
Being afraid,
Has finally settled down.
I am here today,
No king,
Do you see a crown?
My mind is vast,
I can hear the sound repeating in my head.
Boom, Bam, Blast.
At last.
They have come to rescue me.
The duo of sorts.
A kingdom for me,
Only if I share it, of course.

Time and Change

I have seen the days go back and forth.
Yesterday became forever ago.
Today will become never more.
I wonder why time flies the way it does.
Yesterday I was doing so much.
Today I'm forced to do more than needed.
That struggle compiles on top of one another after the other.
The times change, and so does the mood.
My heart says to stay steady and to keep my ground.
The clock says to hurry it up, before all that time all lost.
I have paced up my work,
I have shortened my desire.
Tomorrow I think I will break free from those chains.
Let them rot in that old fire.
To reignite my life,
I will do more than I could imagine.
I will prepare myself for the worst,
But expect that sort of thing to not happen.
I won't wait for an opportunity,
But instead I will create one.
In doing so,
I will pass on my deeds to others,
I could use some help,
And maybe others might need some.
I don't need to live by the rules,
But I don't need to break so many.
I feel insecure at times,
But today I am ready.
I am ready.

Regrets.

I stand here and there,
Sit there and where.
Thinking why I feel and think the way I do.
Am I alone on these thoughts?
Could anyone out there understand it?
To me, no one could.
To me, why would they want to?
I live in a world of sin,
To achieve a smile, I did the most outrageous things.
I lowered my standards,
Accepted what I needed no acceptance for.
I truly walked alone in a cult full of look-a-likes.
How unique am I now?
Was this my intention?
One minute inside my head,
The next out the door.
No goodbye, no hello.
Left the highs to walk down to the lows, a cello.
I had changed my persona,
I had changed my skins.
I had changed my worries,
To meaningless grins.
I didn't know who I was anymore,
Though, I had an idea.
I gave up the most important things for
A better version of a time I wanted to be living in.
I stood as a copy,
I sat as a photograph.
I replicated every one and thing around me,
To fit in.
The intention to never being seen again.
I was wrong.
I was shamed.
I was even saddened by the sound of my name.
So I picked myself up,
Found a love in me, through a pen.
Couldn't stand looking like those around me,
I shed the skin once and then once more again.
I closed my eyes,
Dreamed of being younger.
No worries anymore.
Nothing on my mind but lunch.
The smell of the summer afternoon,
The taste after the loudest crunch.
The ball passing left and right,
The swish of a net.
Now thinking back,
How could I have thought those evils.
One more thing on my list of regret.